The Emotional Revolution by Rosenthal Norman E

Author:Rosenthal, Norman E. [Rosenthal, Norman E.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

2 4 6 I F E E L I N G S

break this cycle, it is important to create a positive atmosphere

and a sense of bonding that the child will not want to lose by

his angry behavior.

2. Make it clear what you expect from the child and what is off

limits. Avoid vague criticisms and sarcasm, such as "Stop raising

hell," or "Why do you always have to make trouble?" Instead, be

specific.

3. Be calm when responding to angry behavior. Many parents scream

back at their children, which sets a bad example and creates an

atmosphere in which it seems legitimate to ventilate anger.

When parents make threats that are not carried out, they leave

their children with a sense that there are no real consequences

to misbehavior. This simply encourages the children to wait out

the storm of their parents' anger.

4 . Respond positively to good behavior. Even the small accomplishments of daily life should be recognized and rewarded.

This will encourage the child to behave well the next time.

5 . Be consistent in setting limits. Erratic standards of discipline reinforce bad behavior. The child may say to himself, "Maybe I didn't get away with it this time, but I will if I keep trying. "

6. Help the child distinguish between feeling angry and behaving

aggressively. If a child's little brother grabs his toy from him, it is

legitimate for him to feel angry, but inappropriate to hit his

brother over the head for doing so.

7. Help the child generate options other than aggression for dealing with anger. Often a child with an anger problem can think of only one way to deal with an insult-aggression. It is important to help the child find other ways. The child whose brother steals his toy, for example, can choose to ignore it, complain to

a parent, offer the brother some other toy, or leave the scene.

Later, after calming down, he can reclaim the stolen toy. Help

the child find acceptable ways of expressing his anger, such as

writing or talking about it or drawing a picture.

8. Teach the child calming skills. Just like adults with anger disorders, angry children tend to explode when provoked or frus-

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